emsilay4 Art Blog

My adventures as a Female Art Student

Personal Projects

School has a way of killing your drive to work on personal projects. While it’s something teachers tell you to work on outside of school it isn’t something easily done. You find yourself so taxed with school work that art outside of your assignments begins to sound like torture!

So to keep my sanity alive this is what I’m working on.

  • Comic – Written by my amazing sister.
  • Sewing – I love making up patterns and translating 2D to real life!
  • Dream Drawings – I have epic dreams almost every night. I want to Illustrate my adventures.

My thoughts on Personal Projects:

So you push back your ideas further and further until you don’t even hear your inner self. I let my personal sketch books die off and didn’t do a single doodle for over 2 years. Okay? So what? What this did was turn what I loved into a horrible chore. While school helps take the rose colored glasses off it shouldn’t take what you love the most about yourself and turn it into your own personal hell.

When I stopped drawing for myself, or doing personal doodles, I lost sight of why I even enjoyed drawing in the first place. I didn’t even carry around pens or pencils in case I got stuck somewhere and needed to kill time. I noticed as I progressed in my schooling I would only do artwork when it was assigned to me. What the heck? Drawing is one of the most relaxing and therapeutic activities I can do for myself. So why did I stop? In short I stopped because the more I learned I realized the less I knew. With this terrorizing realization I became even more stressed over producing bad artwork. I forgot that even when I drew scribbles as a kid it wasn’t for perfection but for expression and fun.

When you’re afraid to fail then fail on purpose. When I know I’m going to do an awful job I become less worried about it. I start playing with the tools. I “ruin” it. I just let myself have a break from stress. I’ve turned in my fair share of homework that started out awful and became something I was proud of because I let myself enjoy the process again. So what does this have to do with personal projects? Personal projects for me are about growth and getting what’s inside out! How do I do this without letting it out?

School isn’t some horrible monster despite what I’ve made it sound like. It is just a time where you have to devote more of your time to your studies. I’ve really improved by leaps and bounds because I chose to get an art education. It excites me every time I think about new art ideas. I have more confidence in my work and in what I am capable of creating. Personal projects are what got me drawing in the first place and what will keep me drawing even when there is no work to be had.

Emsilay4

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